People say there is a time for everything. But then again people say a lot of things and most of the time, they're wrong. For example I chose to write this at 7:45am on a monday, when what I really should be doing, is sleeping. Or probably doing research for some project at school.
And I'm having popcorn for breakfast. So you'll see I'm not the most accurate person regarding timing.
I usually misplace my documents when I'm days away from traveling somewhere or smoke when I just washed my teeth. I get to the train station when the train has already left or fall for someone that just got in a relationship, which is where I'm going with this whole post thing.
You see, I decided I loved my first boyfriend the day he hooked up with someone else, so I waited. Later I met boyfriend #2 and everything was fine. Not a week had we been together when I decided I still loved boyfriend #1. But then, when that was over, I was going abroad with boyfriend #1 and we found the courage to get together. Well, that day they told me we were going to complete opposite sides of the country. So that didn't work out. I came back and a while later I met someone else. Boyfriend #3. I was months away from leaving for college so that didn't work out either. Funny thing though, the very day I was leaving I decided I loved my best friend. FunniER..he decided to reciprocate my feelings which was super inappropriate and my first year of college I was miserably in love. At first I was just in love. The miserable part came right towards the end of the year when I was coming back home and he (who by the way has even worse timing than I do) started to doubt his will to reciprocation. So the day I got home I hooked up with someone else. Ever since I seem to just have given up on boyfriends and just fool around. Usually sticking to my terrible timing tradition.
I'm graduating college in six months. And even though it should have been the "networking" time of my life, it really wasn't. Sure I made friends and I had fun. But I've never felt more lonely. I'm one step closer to believing I have a celebrity complex. Step #1 came this christmas, when, due to the weather I lived a travel odyssey that made airports start to feel like home. Step #2 , If I'm not mistaken IS feeling lonely when you're surrounded by people. Can't wait to get to step #3 which is when HOTELS start to feel like home. Naah..I'll never get there!...I think I'll stay a regular civilian.
Back to my point. I'm tired of being lonely. Which is why, there will be no more fooling around.
Today I decided I'm ready to commit and go back to relationships. I miss feeling loved.
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